23 January 2013

A Journey Out of My Comfort Zone - Day 1

Talking about how to get out of your comfort zone is fine as long as you give theoretical examples with other people, right? But on Kanelstrand I aim to be as real as the Internet allows and that is why I took a wild step out, attempting to achieve simplicity. I am still unsure about the outcome but you will be here to witness the progress and encourage me on the way.

So many of you were brave enough to share your own journeys in the lands out of your comfort zones in Part 1 and Part 2 and I know they inspired the rest, who didn't comment. They also gave me food for thought - sharing is one of the best favors we can do to each other on our simplifying journey.  
Sharing experiences, emotions and life lessons is not about judging. It is a pure and simple connection between souls, innately liberated of judgment exactly because of its fragile nature.

Today I invite you on a journey out of my comfort zone.

I am scared and excited at the same time, and I count on your advice.

Ever since I was 5 I wanted to play the piano. One of my grandmother's brothers was a famous composer and I still remember his vintage folding piano with its unstable squeaking legs. He used to bring it with him when he came to visit, I guess he wasn't able to separate himself of the music in his head for a long time. He was a fascinating person, coming out of the land of radio and TV shows.

The day I had to audition for the piano course was one of the scariest moments in my life. I had no idea what the teacher expected of me. I practically knew nothing. So I entered the quiet room, was told to sit at the piano and play a cord or two. After a couple of unremembered moments and almost fainting I heard that I was accepted to the music school.
music sheet, headphones
Photo: stockmedia
Big journey ahead, leading to visiting the piano course just once because there was nobody who could take me there at the right time.

And so, the piano dream faded pathetically.

Then life continued in its own pace, revealing many more dreams and possibilities to achieve them. I shut the piano dream off and never even learned the notes. I know them by heart but I don't recognize them positioned on the staff. One more thing I know is where they are on the white piano keys. I don't even know what the black keys are for.

Today I enter the realm of music by teaching myself how to play a fascinatingly gentle song. This is absurd, right? We've had a piano at home for more than 2 years now, a birthday present for our daughter and of course I've tried playing something on it but knowing that I am a complete disaster in the field of music I've never been able to achieve anything.

The walls I have been building between the piano and me:

  • I don't know the notes.
  • I have never practiced.
  • I don't have any theoretical knowledge.
  • I don't know how to hold my hands.
  • I don't know how to play.
  • I don't know what follows.

For 2 years, with a piano under my nose I kept guiltily swiping corners and turning my back to it hoping that at least she, our daughter will learn to play. Yes, guiltily, because I knew it was a waste of time to have it and not try. And yet, I was too scared. It looked like there was too much work involved. Even though my husband is very literate in the field and can play by ear and is always here to help me.

In fact the reason I learned to knit was that he learned to play the harmonica. I was so excited with the spirit that entered our house that I felt my hands ready for something new. Learning to knit was another one of the steps out of my comfort zone.

So, today I thought, if I managed to teach myself to knit only with the help of the Internet, why not conquer the piano too?

What do you think? Will I be able to do this?

Follow the rest of my journey:
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5