tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post991379295482738807..comments2024-03-10T10:04:53.177+01:00Comments on Kanelstrand: Step 2: Simple Living As Men's TraitKanelstrandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comBlogger33125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-85302029665757513392012-02-10T00:29:01.772+01:002012-02-10T00:29:01.772+01:00Welcome, Kelly! There are much more steps coming u...Welcome, Kelly! There are much more steps coming up in the next weeks than the 8 that have already passed. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I fully relate to what you are saying. The thought that you are the only person going through hard times can be devastating, but here it is that you have the luck to meet us and we are lucky to have you! I hope you will stick around while the Simple Living Challenge continues.Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-15336545627749429512012-02-09T22:57:52.408+01:002012-02-09T22:57:52.408+01:00i just found your blog through craftgawker, and i&...i just found your blog through craftgawker, and i'm so glad i did! i've been thinking a lot about simplifying my life and living more in line with my priorities lately, and your 8 steps will be very helpful. i have often found myself frustrated at how my boyfriend falls naturally into a simple life, and yet i, the only one of us consciously trying to live more simply, struggle. eric likes what he likes, and those are the only things he buys. i, on the other hand, seem to like and want a much, much broader range of stuff, and i have a hard time treasuring and/or using up what i have before i move on to something new. thanks for voicing what i've been feeling--it makes me feel much more normal, and it gives me hope that i can steadily improve, even if i don't immediately jump to "eric level" simplicity!Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02130801368911286518noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-16140560760864251992012-02-09T16:33:37.485+01:002012-02-09T16:33:37.485+01:00Feeling out of control and a victim of consequence...Feeling out of control and a victim of consequences makes you so powerless, doesn't it! I have noticed how much keeping calm can change my attitude and the way I feel about myself afterwards. It is great that you have such a boyfriend to learn from!Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-85226678085532180762012-02-09T15:50:39.763+01:002012-02-09T15:50:39.763+01:00My boyfriend is incredibly optimistic and has an &...My boyfriend is incredibly optimistic and has an 'everything will be alright' attitude, no matter what the predicament is. When I'm stressing out about something, this drives me up the wall - but I'm not annoyed at him, I'm annoyed that I don't have that attitude. He doesn't lose his temper and he knows how to deal with difficult problems without breaking down. It's something I very much admire and love and I will try to learn to keep calm - and keep things simple!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-65461548762968432402012-02-04T14:43:33.071+01:002012-02-04T14:43:33.071+01:00Oh, I loved reading more about your story and wher...Oh, I loved reading more about your story and where you've come from... and where you're heading! ;) I love, love that quote and may need to post it somewhere, it's so simple and so true. This week has been an unusually busy one for me and at the end of it I realized that I was so mentally tired I wanted to cry as I crawled into bed last night. This morning I realized why the week had drained me so much ~ I hadn't done anything creative and 'just for myself' all week. I usually maintain a balance and spend some time each and every day doing something just because it brings me joy. This week was a reminder to me to slow down and make time, all the time. :)Melindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07287542957454202351noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-46093811915417196032012-02-03T15:31:14.016+01:002012-02-03T15:31:14.016+01:00PS. Neither of us is happier than the other, but w...PS. Neither of us is happier than the other, but we are happier together because we work at it together! We honor the " we " that we are! That always comes first no matter what! There is no room for selfishness in a good and growing marriage...If there is one thing a couple needs to toss out with the recyclables it's selfishness. Yes, I do more housework, but he does things I don't do so it works.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12431126111383952372noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-22484234993531570012012-02-03T15:24:07.391+01:002012-02-03T15:24:07.391+01:00These comments have been as interesting as the pos...These comments have been as interesting as the post!<br /><br />My husband definitely handles general life stress much better than I do, and I think it's because he's better at prioritizing and (going back to lesson #1) he knows everything can't be perfect. He keeps telling me to just "let things to" so maybe I need to take a little of his advice!Paige @ Little Nostalgiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11978050087934003216noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-495596392267076412012-02-03T15:23:55.175+01:002012-02-03T15:23:55.175+01:00Thank you! I had another thought. I also believe t...Thank you! I had another thought. I also believe that acceptance of the biological differences between men and women make living with each other much easier. We need to honor the way we are, have a sense of humor along the way and truly appreciate what each of us has to offer in a relationship. We are in our 20th year of marriage and it gets better every year because we have learned to " yield " more often that argue just because we look at things differently. That's a GOOD thing if you CAN let it be.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12431126111383952372noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-28399234297493718992012-02-03T02:08:36.862+01:002012-02-03T02:08:36.862+01:00Love this post Sonya, I agree. Men address all t...Love this post Sonya, I agree. Men address all things in life very directly and simply. There is a lot less drama in how they perceive things that happen. My husband can get into an argument and forget about in 20 minutes. And I mean totally forget about it, no throwing it in my face much later. It is in the past and he has truly moved on. Hmmm...much to learn from them:)My Inspired Realityhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02610154453483501699noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-56834616122926602012012-02-02T22:00:25.072+01:002012-02-02T22:00:25.072+01:00Valerie, you are stronger than all of us and we sh...Valerie, you are stronger than all of us and we should definitely learn from you if you are the simple one in the family. I hope you will be around to give us your advice :)Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-73118562101480784302012-02-02T21:58:40.469+01:002012-02-02T21:58:40.469+01:00I am thankful to have a psychologist as a best blo...I am thankful to have a psychologist as a best blogging friend that can pull a statistic or two at the right moment!<br /><br />According to the statistics then, it turns out that we fuel each other, right? Men are happier because of us and we should be able to become happier by absorbing, instead of hating and complaining.<br /><br />It takes a lot of hard work, and I know that not all men are equal but it is always good to keep an open mind and as you say, to have wonderful blog friends. Then only the sky is the limit!Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-26514708582901133062012-02-02T21:52:29.612+01:002012-02-02T21:52:29.612+01:00You are right, Karen. Generalizing is dangerous an...You are right, Karen. Generalizing is dangerous and yet there are typical characteristics that are connected to both sexes. Sure, men are from Mars and women are from Venus and that is why there is a lot to learn on both ends. <br /><br />I would like to give women a chance to forgive their husbands and possibly see them in a new light. When you erase some of your stereotypes you are able to see things you haven't seen before and you are more positive. What is more, then you are willing to take and learn. <br /><br />And exactly because men are wired differently, I think we can adapt some of their traits, which sometimes have to do with simplicity,Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-48052134711154619382012-02-02T21:46:42.152+01:002012-02-02T21:46:42.152+01:00Being a bit egoistic sometimes has its positive si...Being a bit egoistic sometimes has its positive sides, hasn't it! It is a stereotype I think that women should put themselves last and it makes sense to a point but then... if you don't love yourself, who would?Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-36537453234002533312012-02-02T21:44:40.929+01:002012-02-02T21:44:40.929+01:00Deb, I couldn't have said it better! It's ...Deb, I couldn't have said it better! It's like you read my mind. Thank you!Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-17517560020036620202012-02-02T19:51:38.537+01:002012-02-02T19:51:38.537+01:00I can definitely see how men could be happier than...I can definitely see how men could be happier than women, at least in some ways. Like, for instance, women are constantly stressing about how they look, particularly when they begin to age. <i>Is that a new wrinkle? Is my hair going grey? Does this dress make me look fat?</i> It's just an acknowledged fact that women tend to be more worried about their appearance than most men, and I think that could probably take a lot of enjoyment out of life.<br /><br />It's great that you've learned from your husband, and it sounds like you've come a long way. Great post!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-14882877078152684662012-02-02T19:11:50.587+01:002012-02-02T19:11:50.587+01:00This is an interesting take on simplification. My ...This is an interesting take on simplification. My husband is a big city guy, he loves all the little luxuries of life. I myself like to keep things simple, and only need a few things to get by. It drives my husband crazy when he wants to buy me gifts, and I only want books. We have been married almost 24 year and over the years he has learned to enjoy life with a little less and a simple home.<br />Valerie<br />Everyday InspiredAdditionsstylehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11527179044598322609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-21932560062999381842012-02-02T16:46:45.067+01:002012-02-02T16:46:45.067+01:00First of all, that is an absolutely gorgeous photo...First of all, that is an absolutely gorgeous photo of your husband! As a psychology teacher, I can confirm that men are happier than women. The statistics prove that - but only for a certain type of man - guess which one...<br /><br />married men! It's true! So that should make everyone feel better. Life is about relationships. In order to be happy we have to work on our relationship with ourselves (that's what this challenge is about!) and on our relationships with those around us. Married men are not only happier, but they are healthier and live longer than unmarried men. As women, we obviously play an important role there!<br /><br />You have touched on the big difference between men and women, Sonya. Men don't have any trouble prioritizing. Women do. I'm convinced it's part of our nurturing genes. We equate a priority with love or importance. "My husband can't be a priority over my children." So everything we do becomes a #1 priority. This leads over time to physical and mental illness (I am unfortunately speaking from personal experience).<br /><br />20 or 30 years (or more) of bad habits can be changed. It takes patience and determination and wonderful blog friends and it can be done!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10243528123846801948noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-14058077853428350652012-02-02T16:24:26.841+01:002012-02-02T16:24:26.841+01:00I think it's dangerous to generalize that men ...I think it's dangerous to generalize that men are happier than women...simpler in their thinking about clutter? May be. But not necessarily happier in life in general. They have their stresses too but do not always share their innermost thoughts on that. Men are wired differently than women in all aspects so how they view 'simple' and 'happy' are not the same as women.<br /><br />And do men really do what they want to do always? No. Some men? Probably. <br /><br />But one thing for sure. Women have different priorities than men, whether we are raising our kids and staying home or working out side the home....we hate seeing dirty dishes in the sink. Not so much for men. They can watch a game on TV and not flinch if the sink is filled. That's the difference. <br /><br />Thanks for the thought provoking post, as always.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-47845717674495448222012-02-02T15:25:06.491+01:002012-02-02T15:25:06.491+01:00Hi! I am new to your blog, but so far I am loving ...Hi! I am new to your blog, but so far I am loving it!<br /><br />You are completely correct about men being simplifying naturals. I've been writing about this myself, and I am learning so much from my husband about prioritizing "me" time and doing what I want to do instead of what needs to be done for the household. <br /><br />This attitude not only makes for a happier wife, but a more equalized household - before this, I felt like I did all the planning and housework. And it turns out I was because I wouldn't put myself first, haha. <br /><br />Thanks for the thoughts!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-71823003150561128402012-02-02T15:10:15.525+01:002012-02-02T15:10:15.525+01:00Thank you for disagreeing, Margo! I appreciate the...Thank you for disagreeing, Margo! I appreciate the experience you share, it gives me food for thought. Of course, I know that not all men are created equal and I was sure there will be someone with a different experience. <br /><br />Do you think that it is possible that you are a perfectionist attracting such kind of men who mostly rely on you because you always strive to do everything perfectly and give attention and care even when YOU need them? <br /><br />I have a close relative that sounds much like you. She is an amazing person, who is skilled in almost all fields of life and basically appears to be self-sufficient. The men around here were intelligent and pleasant but never good enough. Her approach to work is pretty much the same - she does everything perfectly, and overtakes responsibilities to the point of turning herself into a physical and psychological wreck.<br /><br />Without a man by her side who is willing/allowed to take responsibility, she feels completely alone. Her daughter, who is in her late 20s, well educated and with a good job, living with her cannot help her much. In fact, she seems to be mimicking her mother. So both of them have been running in the same cycle again and again.<br /><br />Have all men in your life ever been how you describe them?Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-21254383350856582132012-02-02T14:46:21.789+01:002012-02-02T14:46:21.789+01:00Thank you for you warm words, Colleen. I am glad t...Thank you for you warm words, Colleen. I am glad to have you here, and I hope you will join the conversation in this backyard party!Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-10854556532734246912012-02-02T14:44:54.944+01:002012-02-02T14:44:54.944+01:00Yes, this is something we women should try and do:...Yes, this is something we women should try and do: be content with what we have and don't count on objects to make us happy :)Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-28965969601730077072012-02-02T14:40:34.322+01:002012-02-02T14:40:34.322+01:00Yes! And the ability to accept and learn from what...Yes! And the ability to accept and learn from what we at first might see as a flaw is character building!Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-5371611214377043172012-02-02T14:34:31.922+01:002012-02-02T14:34:31.922+01:00You must be proud to have raised your sons like th...You must be proud to have raised your sons like that! And isn't it exciting when the time comes to be able to look at them, as grown-up people and simply admire them for what they have become and how they have interpreted your parental efforts?!Kanelstrandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00656658673748250383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318789008187152060.post-18118798151957631052012-02-02T14:32:17.201+01:002012-02-02T14:32:17.201+01:00I've learned a lot from my handsome Yankee ove...I've learned a lot from my handsome Yankee over the years. And, now I am learning from our son...He's just so relaxed and laid back... takes things as they come...that being said. I LOVE everything about being a woman and the yin/yang of a life lived with two men. I've learned to live with less in the way of material things, appreciate more and I embrace all of my womanhood, even perimenopause which I'm smack dab in the middle of!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12431126111383952372noreply@blogger.com